Browsing through the names of the many stores in the mall, I came across one that spoke much louder than all the others. A large portion of the wall beside me was covered in advertisements for Victoria’s Secret.
I walked speedily past the giant posters of half-naked women and moved my eyes to the floor.
Those photos had a message to give and it spoke loud and clear. They seemed to be saying, “Flaunt what you got. Embrace your seductive side. This is what being a real woman is all about.”
I can’t walk through an aisle of a store without being bombarded with the constant message of counterfeit femininity.
Girls, you know what I’m talking about. We are constantly being told that we need to show off our bodies to get attention if we ever want to gain real worth.
We are told that beauty comes form the inside, but we are shown something totally different.
A message is being sent that says that being a real woman isn’t about following God’s plan, it’s about manipulating and using men for our advantage.
Without being anchored in God’s design for us as women, we will soon be carried away into the flow of this culture.
In the first two parts of this series, we went over the battle we all face and what real women look like. Now I want to turn to how we can stay encouraged through this fight by building strong, uplifting relationships with the people around us.
Surrounding ourselves with those who honor God in their lives will help us remain strong and ready to fight.
I’m going to answer a few questions that will help you build relationships founded on God’s Word.
1. What kind of friends do I look for?
Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 “Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their labor. For if they fall, one will lift up his companion. But woe to him who is alone when he falls, for he has no one to help him up.”
Everyone makes mistakes. Sometimes we’re going to buy in to the lies of Satan and fall into temptation. It says right there in the Bible that two are better than one because we can help each other up when we fall.
Choosing friends wisely seriously makes a difference. There are some friendships that will encourage you and draw you closer to God and there are friendships that will only pull you further down.
Remind yourself to purposely seek out people who are helpful, kind, not easily angered, and honoring to God.
They’re out there, I assure you! Of course no one is perfect, but if there is someone who is serious about living for Christ, you will see a difference in the way they act.
2. I don’t know very many people who live to honor God. Where can I find some good friends?
There are people pretty much everywhere you go. I have made some great friends from church, my co-op, and my volleyball team!
I know that some of you either don’t have a church that you go to or your school isn’t the most uplifting, but if you start purposely seeking godly people out, you will find some.
Something to keep in mind is that, if you want to have good, Christian friends, you need to be a good, Christian friend yourself. Pray and ask God to help you too! The power of prayer is amazing and God always hears you.
3. What if I’m too nervous to meet someone new?
Last year I took drivers training. I was the only homeschooler there and one of the very few Christians (fortunately I had one friend there so I wasn’t completely alone!). Quite a few of the teens there were swearing and talking about all the drama that was going on in their lives.
Being the one girl who didn’t really know anyone, I stuck close to my friend and made some small talk with a couple of the girls there. However, there was one person who stood out to me. I’ll just call him James.
James wasn’t like everyone else. He didn’t seem to be filled with all the drama that occupied everyone else’s mind. Throughout driver’s training he smiled a lot and brought a Bible to read during the breaks we had between classes. I didn’t feel so alone anymore.
Even though he was surrounded by teens who weren’t being very godly, he wasn’t afraid to show people that he belonged to God and wanted to live for him.
Why am I telling you this? Because I wanted to meet James and tell him that I was a Christian too. Before class I would try to come up with what to say and when to say it, but then I would scold myself for not going through with it.
God gave me several opportunities to talk to James, but each time, I came up with an excuse and let it pass me by. Soon enough drivers training ended and I never once told him that I was encouraged by his example.
Girls, it’s hard sometimes, I know, but if you’re praying for an opportunity to make some good friends, be prepared to take it. It takes a real woman to put aside her excuses and fears to fight this battle.
2 Timothy 1:7 “For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.”
A Challenge For This Week:
Seek out at least one godly person that you aren’t friends with and pray for an opportunity to talk to them. If God opens one up, put aside your fears and take it!