She was beautiful. She was rich, famous, and sexy.
If their was ever a real woman, it was her. She had everything she could ever want; fame, money, looks, attention. Girls looked up to her; wanted to be like her. She had everything that this world said would bring happiness and fulfillment.
However, she didn’t have the one thing that would bring lasting joy. Even though she was noticed by everyone, she didn’t feel loved or valued.
Sadly, on August 5, 1962, she committed suicide at the young age of 36. This is the story of the rich and famous woman, Marilyn Monroe.
I was shocked when I heard this side of Marilyn’s life. All we ever see is the happy-go-lucky smile on posters and magazines.
For the longest time, I would have never guessed that Marilyn Monroe felt worthless and alone. It wasn’t until I read about this story on a blog by Girl Defined Ministries that I learned that Marilyn was abused and neglected all of her childhood.
Though she did become famous, it never provided her with lasting value.
So, what is a real woman?
If everything that this world says will bring happiness and satisfaction only brings emptiness, where should we turn next?
God didn’t leave us empty handed. He didn’t create us and say, “Your world is gonna be filled with lies that will leave you empty. You’ll get hurt and be left to deal with it all by yourself. Have fun.”
No, He created us and said, “You’ll make mistakes; sometimes you’ll get hurt, but I am with you! You are beautiful and valued. I love you! (Romans 3:23; John 16:33; Psalm 139:14; Zephaniah 3:17)”
Jesus is the One who gives us real worth, but how can we accept that when we’re busy chasing after lies? How do we find true fulfillment when we’re surrounded by false femininity? What makes a woman a real woman?
1. Seek God First
Deuteronomy 4:29 says, ” But from there you will seek the Lord your God and you will find him, if you search after him with all your heart and with all your soul.”
Psalm 40:16 says, “But may all who seek you rejoice and be glad in you; may those who love your salvation say continually, “Great is the Lord!””
We are promised that if we seek God, we will find Him. David writes in Psalms that we should rejoice and be glad because God is faithful!
I remember one time when I was getting extremely overwhelmed. I was so focused on what I had to get done that it made me stressed (and, let’s be honest, I was pretty grumpy too). The one thing I didn’t do was turn to God and take the time to pray about it.
Believe it or not, after I spent some time talking to God about my stressful day, I was able to calm down and take things one step at time. I was reminded that God is in control and that I don’t have to get so overwhelmed with things!
When I seek His face first, everything else will work out. Whether I get into an argument, start to feel stressed again, or become discouraged, I can seek the Lord and honor Him with the way I respond to those circumstances!
2. Make Time For Relationships
Ephesians 4:2 says, “Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love.”
Proverbs 17:17 says, “A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for a time of adversity.”
Relationships are a huge chunk of my life. I have family, friends, acquaintances, etc. Part of biblical womanhood is spending time to nurture your relationships so that they will flourish.
Overall, women are emotional, nurturing, and sensitive (I’m not saying that this is true for every woman out there and I’m not saying that men can’t be nurturing either, but in the grand scheme of things, these are some of the main characteristics of women).
God made us this way for a reason! Just as men reflect parts of God’s character that we can’t, we reflect parts of God’s character that men can’t. These gifts and characteristics that God has given us are meant to be used to help each other and share His goodness and love with others.
3. Honor God With Your Beauty
1 Corinthians 6:19-20 says, “Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body.”
1 Peter 3:3,4 says, “ Do not let your adornment be merely outward—arranging the hair, wearing gold, or putting on fine apparel—rather let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is very precious in the sight of God.”
We all know that a lot of the time, women are associated with beauty. This isn’t an accident! God made us each beautiful in our own unique ways.
I personally love dressing up and messing around with make-up. When asked what kind of girl I am (i.e. girlie girl, tomboy, etc.), I simply say that I am a little bit of each. I enjoy getting dirty and chilling outside, but I also enjoy being girlie!
There is absolutely nothing wrong with appreciating the beauty that God has given us. What we need to keep in mind, however, is that we reflect God and His character. He tells us that our our adornment shouldn’t only be what we look like, but the condition of our hearts. He even compares our bodies to a temple for the Holy Spirit to dwell in!
Just because I have chosen not to douse my face in make-up and wear immodest clothing, doesn’t mean that I am ashamed of my body. I look at it like this. I was created beautifully and wonderfully by God and reflect HIS beauty by honoring Him with my body.
Our culture isn’t big on modesty or purity, but those are things that are very precious to God!
Many girls and women out there are struggling to find their worth and identity. They see the gorgeous models who seem to have it all and gain the mindset of wishing, “If I only had that…”
We who have experienced the true freedom, joy, and beauty of Christ know that He is the One who brings fulfillment and meaning.
Choose to become the real woman that you were created to be!
Don’t forget to come back for part 3 of this 5-part series to learn how you can stay encouraged through this battle!
What do you think makes a real woman?
What can you do today to live out biblical womanhood?